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22. What school did you go to again?

At times everyone's had to work or interact with some people that are supposed to have the knowledge they say (in their field) but don't. Most of the time we're able to side step them, explain the issue to someone else (hopefully someone above them) and then run away. Literally, run away.

Jim: So, in a nutshell, the application has the ability to report out data via SQL, and since we're using Crystal Reports (CR), you can use the CR features such as export to PDF and even send out reports via email.
Cat: Hey, CR! Ok, now we're talking my language here!
Jim: I'm sorry, you're from the IT line as well? I was under the impression (looks down at meeting attendance list) that you're from Sales? You're the Sales Director even. *cough* its nice meeting you by the way.
Cat: Uh huh. Oh no back when I was doing my degree I had plenty of CR experience!
Jim: Well good so as you can see, using CR, we can 'push' reports out via email, a fact I think you'd benefit greatly from.
Cat: Oh yes, we need that.
Jim: Whats your infrastructure setup like right now?
Cat: Don't worry about that, just quote us the application and maintenance, we should be able to work out the hardware based on our current infrastructure.
Jim: Well it sounds like you know what you want, I'll get on it right away!

{3 weeks and one sale later}

Support: Morning, how can I help you today?
Cat: Your application is buggy! It doesn't seem to be able to send out reports via email.
Support: Let me have a look at this, can you successfully push out the reports in CR?
Cat: OF COURSE! I know CR very well!
Support: Thats great. So CR gets the report out, but it doesn't get emailed?
Cat: Yes. Your sales guy promised CR reports to be sent out via email!
Support: Is there an error you're getting? From your mail application or a bounce email, you know something like that?
Cat: What mail application? I want the CR report sent out to my director, its not doing that?
Support: I'm sure we can resolve this quickly. What do you use for your email, Outlook or Lotus Notes?
Cat: Huh? Hotmail?
Support: . . . . . . Can I please speak to your IT department?
Cat: Like I said, your programmers are bad in CR. You guys really need pointers.
Support: I'll let them know right away!
Cat: You do that!
Support: Let me get this right. You're trying to push the CR report, which requires a Mail Application to do so, into Hotmail. I dont think its going to work. It works with MS Outlook or Lotus Notes. Hotmail is a web based email, at best you should print to PDF your CR report and attach it there.
Cat: When I was doing my degree they could do that and it worked!
Support: Ma'am, I think you need help.
Cat: Um, CR help?
Support: Who can say what sort of help you need lady! Maybe a Psychiatrist!
Maybe a six pack or two! Bye!

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