It’s early-January 2026, and we have officially moved. The Director, in a fit of "Sustainability Synergy," decided our old office—which had the distinct advantage of doors that opened with handles—was "insufficiently iconic." We are now housed in the Apex-Eco-Smart-Tower in the heart of KL. It’s a glass-and-steel monolith that claims to be "AI-Integrated."
In IT terms, "AI-Integrated" is marketing-speak for "We’ve replaced all the light switches with sensors that don't work, and the door handles with facial recognition software that thinks anyone wearing a mask or glasses is a domestic insurgent.
The Director spent his first morning vibrating with pride. "Look at the dashboard, {Generic IT Guy Name Here}! The building is thinking!"
"It’s thinking we’re at 98% humidity, Sir," I replied, staring at the BMS (Building Management System) which was currently trying to compensate by turning the server room into a walk-in freezer.
I’d only been in the building two hours when the first ticket came in. Brenda from Accounts couldn't get into the pantry. The "Smart Fridge" had scanned her vitals and decided her cholesterol was too high for a second hot chocolate.
The 2026 digital transformation is off to a flying start!
PS: Yes I am not about to post my name here
Yours truly,
{Generic IT Guy Name Here}
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