17. Inefficiency

My Holy Oyster, I'm depressed! Here I am, a mind the size of a university computer center, and they give me inane tasks to do. "Would you please configure a VPN server on that linux box?" Sure, I mean, I'll do it, just don't try to give me anything easier to do. And I've got this terrible pain in the right part of my throat. And my right ear aches, too. It's all because of the phone chatter. "I've got this SQL query that takes only a couple of minutes, but if I add another condition, it takes a whole day. Is it possible to optimise it in any way?" Oh Holy Banana, those people simply lack any and all imagination. There I go, engaging my brain for three seconds to solve a problem, and then switching it off for ten minutes while I explain the stuff. What a waste. No wonder my throat and ear ache. They're terribly abused, compared to my brain. What a depressing bunch of people.
I could easilly run the whole world, but no, they know it better. They'll just give me bits and pieces of puzzles to solve. Undoubtedly such a kind of bits they don't feel like solving. They just don't have a soul. How depressing. Here I am, a mind the size of twenty Google computer clusters, and all I keep working on are tasks that wouldn't take more than a trained rat to solve. Well, I admit, the transaction server I'm currently designing and coding would take a large and mean-looking trained dog, but this is only a small exception. "Hey, this works great! Say, is there anything wrong? You don't look very glad about it." Sorry, it's just that it's been so long since I used those muscles on my face they've atrophied. I'd have to do special exercises for a year to rebuild them. But I don't think two grins a year is a sufficient motivation. Just give me some tape and I'll fix me a smile.
This world is all wrong. Instead of giving me the control over the planet so they can relax and enjoy beach parties (along with me, of course), people rather make themselves and me miserable. But of course, they know it better. What a waste of a great brain and perfectly fine beaches.